it's not our loss, but theirs, for they left the only person who wouldn't give up on them....
SO TRUEEE. stole this from this guy that added me. thanks ACM. haha.
i think i wanna try to be your friend, but if i dont make any progress it's whatever i tried. i still wanna be your friend & you know that i'll always be there for you through thick & thin no matter what happened between us. i'm probably the only girl that could deal with all your shit & the way you act. i just miss hanging out with you. i dont hang out with you just because your nice, i hang out with you because i care about you & because i love you.
love. fuck love. /: there's so much hurt into one thing. numb yourself. it won't hurt as much.
random texts from people are funny. whew. jennys so mean, but so nice. haha
but you caught me off guard. i didn't think you'd text me at all anymore.
but here you are. fixing what we lost, but your still the same. just making sure i'm still here if you need me, huh? don't even text me much still. so..
i really don't give a fuck what happens between us now.
told you i wasn't here for games. so do what you do baby. & if you really wanna be with me. prove that shit to my face. don't tell me. show me.
a picture is worth a thousand words.
words just compliments an image. if there's not image to begin with, then how can you compliment yourself? you say your this & that you're that. you've shown me you can kiss and laugh & play, which was cute. but still. show me that you really wanna be with me.
i'm waiting.
3.25.2009
"ID FUCK WIT ALL YA'LL CAS YA'LL SO BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!"
NIGGA WTF!?
im tired of these niggas with no respect for a good female.
tryna be a pimp & shit. your just a scared ass kidd that doesn't know what he wants.
freals. im tired of this shit.
I TOLD YOU BEFORE, i'm not HERE TO PLAY GAMES & your gna say what you said was real. THEN WTF is that dumbass shit on your page? wow you think im that naive, bitch pleaaaaase!
tryna say im not the only one who got hurt. but im the ONLY one who's gotten hurt hella times. so i'm more familiar with your game then you. at first that shit worked good. but now, hahaha don't make me laugh.
FUCK THAT SHIT.
"dont hate the player, jasmine. hate the game"
just hate the game..
talk to your females.
cas ill tell you this nignagg,
I DONT GIVES A FUCK no more.
LONG HAIR, DONT CARE!!!
just like kanye said, "you do you & im gon' do mine, you do you & im just gon'be fine."
pfft. you aint my diamond, just another zirconia added to my dam pile.
im tired of these niggas with no respect for a good female.
tryna be a pimp & shit. your just a scared ass kidd that doesn't know what he wants.
freals. im tired of this shit.
I TOLD YOU BEFORE, i'm not HERE TO PLAY GAMES & your gna say what you said was real. THEN WTF is that dumbass shit on your page? wow you think im that naive, bitch pleaaaaase!
tryna say im not the only one who got hurt. but im the ONLY one who's gotten hurt hella times. so i'm more familiar with your game then you. at first that shit worked good. but now, hahaha don't make me laugh.
FUCK THAT SHIT.
"dont hate the player, jasmine. hate the game"
just hate the game..
talk to your females.
cas ill tell you this nignagg,
I DONT GIVES A FUCK no more.
LONG HAIR, DONT CARE!!!
just like kanye said, "you do you & im gon' do mine, you do you & im just gon'be fine."
pfft. you aint my diamond, just another zirconia added to my dam pile.
3.24.2009
diamond in the rough...
went to physical therapy today! hella awesome.
my hand smells like cilantro though... thought id let you know.
hella in a better mood after my doctors appt.
ok so he asked me how i was & i was like
"my shoulder or just life?"
"your shoulder..."
"it's good"
"ok, now what about life?"
"well, schools easy i just gotta raise up my grade for one class it's shouldn't be that bad. but my love life... it's not cool"
"your love life? you don't need one your 19!"
"yeah i know but still i've been single for awhile"
and so i told him about tony kinda. and how when i talk to someone i just get to know them to see if i wanna be with them and he was like
"you shouldn't do it that way. let me ask you a question, and you don't have to answer it just yet... what are the qualities you want in the opposite sex? don't answer it just yet just think about it"
then he said
"look at it this way, when you know what you want... you look for those qualities in a man. don't settle for less, you wouldn't settle for second best right? it's like choosing a diamond. diamonds have no flaws. if you had to choose from zirconia & a diamond. what would you choose? you wouldn't choose a zirconia, zirconias are found all over the place, you can always replace them, but if you pick a diamond... you'll have it forever. so try to find that diamond in the rough, don't settle for less than that"
DAM. hella opened my eyes about things! i mean i have standards for guys but him. he had two specific things he wanted in his woman. she had to be christian & get along with his family hella good. this girl he dated was a different race & he just couldn't do that & then this other girl just got along with his family ok. so he couldn't do that either, he found a girl that had both. i was like dammmm nigga!
i was like if your picky you won't really get anything. i guess i'll let a few things slide but the big parts that are important to me, they'll stick. freals.
so ima make a list. just not now cas im hungry.
ANYWAY.
parents suck!
"i'll drop that mother fucker!!!"
mmm tony called me today, but my mom was using the phone so i didn't get to pick up & then when i called back he didn't answer & i texted him but he never texted me back.
freals. i hate this dumbass game.
if you fucking wanna be with me, don't just tell me... SHOW ME you really want me to be what you say. if it's real... you'd try at least. i've been trying. so don't FUCK WITH MY EMOTIONS. i've been fucked over so many times. i dont deserve to be played anymore. ive been through this shit before. im ready for a real man. so step up your game nigga! & get on my level
i'm done with these games.
so either try, or just step off. cas i'm not playin no more.
my hand smells like cilantro though... thought id let you know.
hella in a better mood after my doctors appt.
ok so he asked me how i was & i was like
"my shoulder or just life?"
"your shoulder..."
"it's good"
"ok, now what about life?"
"well, schools easy i just gotta raise up my grade for one class it's shouldn't be that bad. but my love life... it's not cool"
"your love life? you don't need one your 19!"
"yeah i know but still i've been single for awhile"
and so i told him about tony kinda. and how when i talk to someone i just get to know them to see if i wanna be with them and he was like
"you shouldn't do it that way. let me ask you a question, and you don't have to answer it just yet... what are the qualities you want in the opposite sex? don't answer it just yet just think about it"
then he said
"look at it this way, when you know what you want... you look for those qualities in a man. don't settle for less, you wouldn't settle for second best right? it's like choosing a diamond. diamonds have no flaws. if you had to choose from zirconia & a diamond. what would you choose? you wouldn't choose a zirconia, zirconias are found all over the place, you can always replace them, but if you pick a diamond... you'll have it forever. so try to find that diamond in the rough, don't settle for less than that"
DAM. hella opened my eyes about things! i mean i have standards for guys but him. he had two specific things he wanted in his woman. she had to be christian & get along with his family hella good. this girl he dated was a different race & he just couldn't do that & then this other girl just got along with his family ok. so he couldn't do that either, he found a girl that had both. i was like dammmm nigga!
i was like if your picky you won't really get anything. i guess i'll let a few things slide but the big parts that are important to me, they'll stick. freals.
so ima make a list. just not now cas im hungry.
ANYWAY.
parents suck!
"i'll drop that mother fucker!!!"
mmm tony called me today, but my mom was using the phone so i didn't get to pick up & then when i called back he didn't answer & i texted him but he never texted me back.
freals. i hate this dumbass game.
if you fucking wanna be with me, don't just tell me... SHOW ME you really want me to be what you say. if it's real... you'd try at least. i've been trying. so don't FUCK WITH MY EMOTIONS. i've been fucked over so many times. i dont deserve to be played anymore. ive been through this shit before. im ready for a real man. so step up your game nigga! & get on my level
i'm done with these games.
so either try, or just step off. cas i'm not playin no more.
3.23.2009
"those of you who fell off, your not even worth mentioning"
WTF?
omg today is hella not a good day. im frustrated, angry & fucking pissed.
idk if you were thinking of me when you said that fell off shit. but if anyone fell off... it was you. you're the one who pushed me away when i needed you most. you made me feel love again and then you left me in the cold with nothing. just as fast you got back into my life, the faster you were gone. disappeared from the face of my earth. i'm the one who kept trying to hang out with you, but you kept saying no. telling me "idk" i hate your stupid idks. you fucking suck a whole lot of dick. i can't even fucking say that i still love you because youre being one of the biggest cunt nuggets of 2009. all i wanted was to be your damn friend, but you can't even do that. can't even take the time out of your busy life to see if i'm doing ok. the one you said you still cared about. out of all the shit i've done for you.... i was fucking there for you when you got down in the dumps. i took every moment in my life to talk to you. to make sure that you were good to go. you hella used me to make yourself feel better. didn't you? and im stupid for letting you do that. UGH. you make my life so complicated. i can't even move on because i still think we're gonna end up together.... well FUCK.MY.LIFE.
it's so easy to tell a girl your feelin her. to tell her "i want you, baby" but you can't even text a bitch to tell her your awake or that you're thinking of her. it's not that hard to type a text. why are boys to deficient with communication? you know how to text other girls. how to cheat. how to ignore someone. how to argue. how to think "oh you got that because of ____". and all that other shit you guys do. hella just putting us down. WTF is up with you people.
idk maybe it's my fault because i just want someone to love me. i have people that do. i just don't have anyone that's special to me anymore. someone i can just be with. someone to trust.
seriously though.
i'm tired of your games.
so if you like me, don't just say it and leave.
PUT IN SOME FUCKING EFFORT.
yeah i can't really see you cas i dont drive. but i mean if you say you want me. you could at least have a conversation with me...
i mean what do you expect when we're an item. im not gonna have a conversation with your lips engulfing mine.
today is just not cracking. i'm too confused.
but i went and hung out with matt, rachel & james. hella long since i seen them. we went to the lake and they jumped off rocks. well, rachel did. no one else did. matt was too buzzed i didn't have a suit & certainly james wasn't gonna jump. he's the only person i know, who's still going out with his gf. since like freshman year. HELLA long. idk how they stay together. & now she's in the Philippines for school. how will they survive.
idk what to wear tomorrow.
i needa smoke a black or cigg.
school hella fails.
omg today is hella not a good day. im frustrated, angry & fucking pissed.
idk if you were thinking of me when you said that fell off shit. but if anyone fell off... it was you. you're the one who pushed me away when i needed you most. you made me feel love again and then you left me in the cold with nothing. just as fast you got back into my life, the faster you were gone. disappeared from the face of my earth. i'm the one who kept trying to hang out with you, but you kept saying no. telling me "idk" i hate your stupid idks. you fucking suck a whole lot of dick. i can't even fucking say that i still love you because youre being one of the biggest cunt nuggets of 2009. all i wanted was to be your damn friend, but you can't even do that. can't even take the time out of your busy life to see if i'm doing ok. the one you said you still cared about. out of all the shit i've done for you.... i was fucking there for you when you got down in the dumps. i took every moment in my life to talk to you. to make sure that you were good to go. you hella used me to make yourself feel better. didn't you? and im stupid for letting you do that. UGH. you make my life so complicated. i can't even move on because i still think we're gonna end up together.... well FUCK.MY.LIFE.
it's so easy to tell a girl your feelin her. to tell her "i want you, baby" but you can't even text a bitch to tell her your awake or that you're thinking of her. it's not that hard to type a text. why are boys to deficient with communication? you know how to text other girls. how to cheat. how to ignore someone. how to argue. how to think "oh you got that because of ____". and all that other shit you guys do. hella just putting us down. WTF is up with you people.
idk maybe it's my fault because i just want someone to love me. i have people that do. i just don't have anyone that's special to me anymore. someone i can just be with. someone to trust.
seriously though.
i'm tired of your games.
so if you like me, don't just say it and leave.
PUT IN SOME FUCKING EFFORT.
yeah i can't really see you cas i dont drive. but i mean if you say you want me. you could at least have a conversation with me...
i mean what do you expect when we're an item. im not gonna have a conversation with your lips engulfing mine.
today is just not cracking. i'm too confused.
but i went and hung out with matt, rachel & james. hella long since i seen them. we went to the lake and they jumped off rocks. well, rachel did. no one else did. matt was too buzzed i didn't have a suit & certainly james wasn't gonna jump. he's the only person i know, who's still going out with his gf. since like freshman year. HELLA long. idk how they stay together. & now she's in the Philippines for school. how will they survive.
idk what to wear tomorrow.
i needa smoke a black or cigg.
school hella fails.
3.22.2009
girl, are you ready? are you ready for love? are you ready for us? are you ready to glow in the dark?
gaah lovin that chris brown song.
your SOOO CLOSEEE!! yet your soo far away. /:
gaaah i wish that night didn't happen that way i could go see you & we could hang out.
fuck it's like romeo & juliet without the families hating each other tho.
the parents just dont like the guy...
the things you do to be with someone, it's amazing how you see different types of people and how they stay together. like hella fighting, getting even, just being happy, sneaking around...
i envy those who's stayed to fight it out. at the end of the day it's all worth it.
it's easier to see someone leave you behind. idk why but i dont want him to leave... hah maybe i'm being too dependent on him, after all we just met. what does he have that makes me wanna be with him after all this confusing shit that went down? idk but i guess ima find out soon.
ugh i can't even see the two people i wanna see most. one lives too far away & my stepdad dont like. the other one just doesn't even wanna talk to me or be my friend. is this really the best? i still miss you, just not as bad as before.
it's so pathetic. im getting a headache
fml to the max
EDIT//
ok, so i feel better. hah.
i'm gonna be his wifey.(:
i just hope everything works out & nothing gets all fucked up or complicated.
he's so far away, so i wont really get attached which is a good thing. i have this habit where i get really dependent on my boys.
im hella excited to get my license.
i already got plans.
pick up audrina
pick up tiffany
drive to school for once
go shopping
get a better job
pick up tony(:
go clubbing
pick up jenny from school
drive to H&M past concord
drive to sac
drive to hayward hang out with angie
visit ashley!!
drive around & play got money by lil wayne hella loud!
do what i waaaant basically. as long as i can afford gass.
mmm im gonna look up tattoo drawings. (:
"you'll probably find a girl that will go & see you"
"no i want you"
"you can get any girl you want, why me?"
"cas i want you"
your SOOO CLOSEEE!! yet your soo far away. /:
gaaah i wish that night didn't happen that way i could go see you & we could hang out.
fuck it's like romeo & juliet without the families hating each other tho.
the parents just dont like the guy...
the things you do to be with someone, it's amazing how you see different types of people and how they stay together. like hella fighting, getting even, just being happy, sneaking around...
i envy those who's stayed to fight it out. at the end of the day it's all worth it.
it's easier to see someone leave you behind. idk why but i dont want him to leave... hah maybe i'm being too dependent on him, after all we just met. what does he have that makes me wanna be with him after all this confusing shit that went down? idk but i guess ima find out soon.
ugh i can't even see the two people i wanna see most. one lives too far away & my stepdad dont like. the other one just doesn't even wanna talk to me or be my friend. is this really the best? i still miss you, just not as bad as before.
it's so pathetic. im getting a headache
fml to the max
EDIT//
ok, so i feel better. hah.
i'm gonna be his wifey.(:
i just hope everything works out & nothing gets all fucked up or complicated.
he's so far away, so i wont really get attached which is a good thing. i have this habit where i get really dependent on my boys.
im hella excited to get my license.
i already got plans.
pick up audrina
pick up tiffany
drive to school for once
go shopping
get a better job
pick up tony(:
go clubbing
pick up jenny from school
drive to H&M past concord
drive to sac
drive to hayward hang out with angie
visit ashley!!
drive around & play got money by lil wayne hella loud!
do what i waaaant basically. as long as i can afford gass.
mmm im gonna look up tattoo drawings. (:
"you'll probably find a girl that will go & see you"
"no i want you"
"you can get any girl you want, why me?"
"cas i want you"
3.20.2009
it is too early to be on here right now. -_-
helllaaa gaaay.
mmmm today im clubbin!! in like hella long.
i wish tony could come. /: id hella spot him. but he doesn't have a ride & i can't find anybody to pick him up.
fuuuuckk.
oh well. hopefully audrina will come too! cas it's gonna be me, jenny, joelle & his crew.
its kinda cold. ugh i still haven't done my medical terminology homework. fuck me sideways.
i wonder if anyone died at wal*mart....?
there's nothing really to say.
except. im not as jealous. maybe cas i dont care? or im waiting for disappointment. who knows.
helllaaa gaaay.
mmmm today im clubbin!! in like hella long.
i wish tony could come. /: id hella spot him. but he doesn't have a ride & i can't find anybody to pick him up.
fuuuuckk.
oh well. hopefully audrina will come too! cas it's gonna be me, jenny, joelle & his crew.
its kinda cold. ugh i still haven't done my medical terminology homework. fuck me sideways.
i wonder if anyone died at wal*mart....?
there's nothing really to say.
except. im not as jealous. maybe cas i dont care? or im waiting for disappointment. who knows.
3.18.2009
UGH
boys disappoint me too much. /:
but i gotta be optimistic, right audrina? hah thanks freal tho for helping esp. lastnight!
i didnt know how much one person who isnt in your life can affect the way you think so much... it makes things much more complicated then they really should be. or maybe im just being blind right now, but im not the only one. right?
but why the fuck was this tax lady tryna talk to me in tagalog even when i kept saying what the bitch still did it. & then she got the nerve to tell my mom she was mad at me? the fuck!?
im only gettin 30 back basically im gettin 81 but i gotta oay her 49 FAIL
i wanna see you again! but without some weird random fighting happening.
cas i wanna get to know you more.
"i will keep you safe forever"
but i gotta be optimistic, right audrina? hah thanks freal tho for helping esp. lastnight!
i didnt know how much one person who isnt in your life can affect the way you think so much... it makes things much more complicated then they really should be. or maybe im just being blind right now, but im not the only one. right?
but why the fuck was this tax lady tryna talk to me in tagalog even when i kept saying what the bitch still did it. & then she got the nerve to tell my mom she was mad at me? the fuck!?
im only gettin 30 back basically im gettin 81 but i gotta oay her 49 FAIL
i wanna see you again! but without some weird random fighting happening.
cas i wanna get to know you more.
"i will keep you safe forever"
3.17.2009
UGH. First impression
Some say that the first impression is everything.
So everything has to go perfect.
what if your perfect impression goes wrong? what do you do then?
what if your parents don't want to see him at your house ever again?
what am i supposed to do then?
things happen for a reason, i guess i'll have to wait to find out what will happen next. i hella don't wanna stop seeing you. you take my mind off kevin & i really believe you might be the person to help me. it was just not the right moment to meet my parents. i hella didn't know that shit was gonna happen, i feel so bad & i hope you guys make it back to sac. fucccck. i feel so embarrassed, but you guys both were just protecting family so it's understandable. i can't believe your still calling me baby(:
i dont even know what to say really.
it was good talking to you audrina. hella made me laugh
"dude, it's cas your not a disney princess" LMFAO
that's the highlight of my day besides robby trying to get hickies from a vacuum HAHA
i'm sorry baby, i pray we make it.
you're not just a friend. trust. (:
winds&solid rock
As she grew fonder of you, you slipped away into the darkness, only to return for a brief taste of cool lovely air, caressing her dark colored hair circling her in your winds lifting her above the ground just like you did before. sadly your winds fade out and you slip away again. this time when you come back to entwine her in your lovely winds she'll be held down by rock solid love that doest come and go. he'll keep her grounded with his love always leading her back to him. slowly her love for you will set itself in the back of her mind while rock solid keeps his ground right in front of her eyes
i think your right.
good cry, good sleep
haha
i kinda feel like if i dont make an effort to come see you, you'll leave me. its not that im not trying. not many of my 'friends' would even consider driving me down there... except a few but one dont gotta car & the other her dad probably wont let her take the car...
im tired & my stomach hurts
tdy was not what i thought it'd be. /:
So everything has to go perfect.
what if your perfect impression goes wrong? what do you do then?
what if your parents don't want to see him at your house ever again?
what am i supposed to do then?
things happen for a reason, i guess i'll have to wait to find out what will happen next. i hella don't wanna stop seeing you. you take my mind off kevin & i really believe you might be the person to help me. it was just not the right moment to meet my parents. i hella didn't know that shit was gonna happen, i feel so bad & i hope you guys make it back to sac. fucccck. i feel so embarrassed, but you guys both were just protecting family so it's understandable. i can't believe your still calling me baby(:
i dont even know what to say really.
it was good talking to you audrina. hella made me laugh
"dude, it's cas your not a disney princess" LMFAO
that's the highlight of my day besides robby trying to get hickies from a vacuum HAHA
i'm sorry baby, i pray we make it.
you're not just a friend. trust. (:
winds&solid rock
As she grew fonder of you, you slipped away into the darkness, only to return for a brief taste of cool lovely air, caressing her dark colored hair circling her in your winds lifting her above the ground just like you did before. sadly your winds fade out and you slip away again. this time when you come back to entwine her in your lovely winds she'll be held down by rock solid love that doest come and go. he'll keep her grounded with his love always leading her back to him. slowly her love for you will set itself in the back of her mind while rock solid keeps his ground right in front of her eyes
i think your right.
good cry, good sleep
haha
i kinda feel like if i dont make an effort to come see you, you'll leave me. its not that im not trying. not many of my 'friends' would even consider driving me down there... except a few but one dont gotta car & the other her dad probably wont let her take the car...
im tired & my stomach hurts
tdy was not what i thought it'd be. /:
hella early.
why is my mom tryna drop me off at school like an hour early?
the fuccckkk!?
anyway. yeah im hella tired i needa sleep more, but when i try to i just can't seem to fall asleep. weird i know. haha!
butt yesss.
we left the drama for my momma like waaaah. haha. it's in the past anyway so whats left to fight for?
nothing really. it's just a waste of my air & that air, im gonna use it for something productive or whatever. but yeah... audrina's pretty cool. she's cooler than i thought she would be. we called a truce so it's al gravy in the navy caahs.
but do we give a fuck if you talk shit?
like tony said, "nah, it's nothin."
hey tonyyy!
i like the way you move
hey tonyyy!
if i could, i would go see you
your the one & only tigger
with the one & only taste
that'll make you feeel
g-g-g-greaaat
frosted flakes are moreee than goood!
their g-g-great!
haha. hella changed the words a bit cas i hella forgot how it actually goes. i got it half way right.
gaaah i gotta go to church wif the madre. text meee!
my stomach hurts
i hope you come over tdy!!
<3
the fuccckkk!?
anyway. yeah im hella tired i needa sleep more, but when i try to i just can't seem to fall asleep. weird i know. haha!
butt yesss.
we left the drama for my momma like waaaah. haha. it's in the past anyway so whats left to fight for?
nothing really. it's just a waste of my air & that air, im gonna use it for something productive or whatever. but yeah... audrina's pretty cool. she's cooler than i thought she would be. we called a truce so it's al gravy in the navy caahs.
but do we give a fuck if you talk shit?
like tony said, "nah, it's nothin."
hey tonyyy!
i like the way you move
hey tonyyy!
if i could, i would go see you
your the one & only tigger
with the one & only taste
that'll make you feeel
g-g-g-greaaat
frosted flakes are moreee than goood!
their g-g-great!
haha. hella changed the words a bit cas i hella forgot how it actually goes. i got it half way right.
gaaah i gotta go to church wif the madre. text meee!
my stomach hurts
i hope you come over tdy!!
<3
3.15.2009
we were in a fairytale but this is farewell
okay, im back up on my grind
you do you and im just gon' do mine
you do you, 'cause i'm just gon' be fine
okay, i got you out my mind
you do you and im just gon' do mine
you do you, 'cause i'm just gon' be fine
okay, i got you out my mind
3.14.2009
TIP YOUR BAAAARTENDERR
LAST NIGHT, was crackinn! except when the cops kept coming cas the noise level was hella loud but fuck i made some good ass drinks.
mango mojito
strawberry mojito
henn & coke
vodka & cran
vodka & pineapple
the flirt
kawakaze i think it is..?
then they had this hella tight as drink from florida that just came out. TYKU i think it's spelled. when you pour the drink that shit lights up & the liquor is actually green that shit is off the hook
i wanna learn how to make the shit tho. my sister made on for the body guard, he said it tasted like juice but he didn't feel it until hella after & he was FUCKED UP.
we got hella tips tho. I got 70 outta it. i could've had more but the cops shut that shit down & the host almost went to jail. /: he's pretty cool tho. he let me use his computer & shit while i hid from the cops. hah
i didn't sleep til 5 or 6 cas i was texting 'tony'. i guess he's still sleeping or something.
but yeah i took pichas their hella cute. i had falsies on. it was cool.
UGH but when we were getting ready...
ang put my lashes on my left eye first and it went like this
ang: alright don't move
me: (hella tryna text and keep my eyes shut OG style) k
ang: alright look down, open your eyes jas
me: .... i can't
ang: LMAO OH SHIT here... (she pulled my bottom lid) i hella glued your eyes shut.
-_-fuckn gay.
this dude in a vest kept smilin at me tho i was like UGH grandpa, im 19 not 21...
it was cool tho i met this girl, and she said she'd get me a ID. muahahhaa. now i dont have to go to just the buddha lounge anymore.
when i turn 21... im gonna try and get my bartending license, so if you need a bartender at a house party, im down for pay.
TODAY,
i hella forgot my username for gmail. so i was hella tryna get my password and shit. its been two days! then i found out i spelled my shit wrong... haha. hella dumbbb.
im hella tired i think ill take a nap or do my midterm..
we got role models maybe ill watch that.
LETS GO SHOPPPIN!!!
imyk
mango mojito
strawberry mojito
henn & coke
vodka & cran
vodka & pineapple
the flirt
kawakaze i think it is..?
then they had this hella tight as drink from florida that just came out. TYKU i think it's spelled. when you pour the drink that shit lights up & the liquor is actually green that shit is off the hook
i wanna learn how to make the shit tho. my sister made on for the body guard, he said it tasted like juice but he didn't feel it until hella after & he was FUCKED UP.
we got hella tips tho. I got 70 outta it. i could've had more but the cops shut that shit down & the host almost went to jail. /: he's pretty cool tho. he let me use his computer & shit while i hid from the cops. hah
i didn't sleep til 5 or 6 cas i was texting 'tony'. i guess he's still sleeping or something.
but yeah i took pichas their hella cute. i had falsies on. it was cool.
UGH but when we were getting ready...
ang put my lashes on my left eye first and it went like this
ang: alright don't move
me: (hella tryna text and keep my eyes shut OG style) k
ang: alright look down, open your eyes jas
me: .... i can't
ang: LMAO OH SHIT here... (she pulled my bottom lid) i hella glued your eyes shut.
-_-fuckn gay.
this dude in a vest kept smilin at me tho i was like UGH grandpa, im 19 not 21...
it was cool tho i met this girl, and she said she'd get me a ID. muahahhaa. now i dont have to go to just the buddha lounge anymore.
when i turn 21... im gonna try and get my bartending license, so if you need a bartender at a house party, im down for pay.
TODAY,
i hella forgot my username for gmail. so i was hella tryna get my password and shit. its been two days! then i found out i spelled my shit wrong... haha. hella dumbbb.
im hella tired i think ill take a nap or do my midterm..
we got role models maybe ill watch that.
LETS GO SHOPPPIN!!!
imyk
3.12.2009
L-L-L-LAAAADIES...
night in vacaville was crackin' last night!
Tiffany & I went to eat lunch with Keke at uhhh whats that store called... Quiznos! yeah we went there i hada salad but i didn't eat it all /: i was nervous for some reason haha! and then we dropped keke off and when i tried to put the seat back in the truck it made this hella weird ass noise, hella funny then my asscrack showed to hella people cas SOMEONE decided to drive hella fast
-_-
then we went back to petes and he gave me hella m&ms... it's already the next day and they're almost gone!
then when pete got home we went and met up with mimi & jessica. HELLA FUNNY posted at burgerking talked shit about people i dont know but still it was funny, the faces they were making hella funny
*laughing like mimi* hehe
"hello?"
"HEHE"
*click, calls back*
"hello..."
"was that mimi?"
then we walked around the outlets tried to find an outfit for tiffany. hella fugly clothes in the stores. then we went to naughty or nice haha hella weird shit in there. thennn....
LADIESSS NIIIGGHHHTTT!!!!
went to hella salons that gave us free shit! first one gave us mojitos (virgins ):) got some hand massages, cheese cake hella good too! and signed up for some free jewlery (fake ass rinestones tho) then we got some shampoo thing..
next salon gave us some fuckin grapes and chocolate brownie bites
lady talking to tiffany: oh yeah your hair is fine
lady looks at mimi, jessica & me: yeah we'll just give you guys some shampoo
mimi: it's cas we got black hair
me: the fuck what kinda hair do i got? asian hair?
OH BUT THE LAST SALON, fuckin crackin!
hella nice inside! private rooms dope waiting room. they wouldn't give us wine tho, dam. but jessica & i got us hella salami and some of those cracker things they had HELLA GOOOOD. fuck i want some right now...
tomorrows gonna be hella fun too!
bartendinnnn & gettin moneys. is you mad?
hope i dont fuck up on them drinks though... haha that'd suck to get yelled at by some drunk bitch or something.
i dont get to drink tho ): oh well at least im gettin money honey!
ughhh my stomach hurts & i gotta revise my essay, some of my shit dont make sense. FUCKKKK. oh well at least i gotta chance to get a better grade niggaaas!
with the money, i think ill go buy:
-forever21 clothes, i need more cute shit.
-mac cosmetics! i need more shadows & that bent brush i hella want! or the slanted eyeliner brush. i got the eyebrow one and it is not crackin havin to deal with that thick brush on my eyes.
-H&M
-s'more heels! i cant wear those boots in the summer!
-earrings
-urban decay primer potion
-haircut?
depends on how much i get. either that ill save it.
UGH i gotta do taxes!
i gotta headace & im nervous. /:
"cas we belong together now
forever united here somehow
you got a piece of me
and honestly
my life would suck without you
being with you is so dysfunctional
i really shouldn't miss you, but i cant let go"
utada hikaru made a song that made its way to american that is tighttt
Tiffany & I went to eat lunch with Keke at uhhh whats that store called... Quiznos! yeah we went there i hada salad but i didn't eat it all /: i was nervous for some reason haha! and then we dropped keke off and when i tried to put the seat back in the truck it made this hella weird ass noise, hella funny then my asscrack showed to hella people cas SOMEONE decided to drive hella fast
-_-
then we went back to petes and he gave me hella m&ms... it's already the next day and they're almost gone!
then when pete got home we went and met up with mimi & jessica. HELLA FUNNY posted at burgerking talked shit about people i dont know but still it was funny, the faces they were making hella funny
*laughing like mimi* hehe
"hello?"
"HEHE"
*click, calls back*
"hello..."
"was that mimi?"
then we walked around the outlets tried to find an outfit for tiffany. hella fugly clothes in the stores. then we went to naughty or nice haha hella weird shit in there. thennn....
LADIESSS NIIIGGHHHTTT!!!!
went to hella salons that gave us free shit! first one gave us mojitos (virgins ):) got some hand massages, cheese cake hella good too! and signed up for some free jewlery (fake ass rinestones tho) then we got some shampoo thing..
next salon gave us some fuckin grapes and chocolate brownie bites
lady talking to tiffany: oh yeah your hair is fine
lady looks at mimi, jessica & me: yeah we'll just give you guys some shampoo
mimi: it's cas we got black hair
me: the fuck what kinda hair do i got? asian hair?
OH BUT THE LAST SALON, fuckin crackin!
hella nice inside! private rooms dope waiting room. they wouldn't give us wine tho, dam. but jessica & i got us hella salami and some of those cracker things they had HELLA GOOOOD. fuck i want some right now...
tomorrows gonna be hella fun too!
bartendinnnn & gettin moneys. is you mad?
hope i dont fuck up on them drinks though... haha that'd suck to get yelled at by some drunk bitch or something.
i dont get to drink tho ): oh well at least im gettin money honey!
ughhh my stomach hurts & i gotta revise my essay, some of my shit dont make sense. FUCKKKK. oh well at least i gotta chance to get a better grade niggaaas!
with the money, i think ill go buy:
-forever21 clothes, i need more cute shit.
-mac cosmetics! i need more shadows & that bent brush i hella want! or the slanted eyeliner brush. i got the eyebrow one and it is not crackin havin to deal with that thick brush on my eyes.
-H&M
-s'more heels! i cant wear those boots in the summer!
-earrings
-urban decay primer potion
-haircut?
depends on how much i get. either that ill save it.
UGH i gotta do taxes!
i gotta headace & im nervous. /:
"cas we belong together now
forever united here somehow
you got a piece of me
and honestly
my life would suck without you
being with you is so dysfunctional
i really shouldn't miss you, but i cant let go"
utada hikaru made a song that made its way to american that is tighttt
3.10.2009
reminisce
hah. im looking at all my old inbox mail things.
hella funny. & cute
"HoMieSk8eR156:..i know what i had .. i lost it and now ill do every thing i can not to let that happen again
jsmn m y lo v e: mee too babe. i want us to be together as long as possible. (uhh foreverrr)"
at least you thought so before. whatever.
anyway. hung out with tiffany at the mall for a bit. too bad dress doesn't look that good on me. BELT please? i think so.
gaaah i can't wait to get it. (:
then went to safeway seen urriel. talked to her for a bit.
then i think i seen audrina walking home today...? but im not sure if it was her cas i couldn't see. X|
i m t o y w y l m
hella funny. & cute
"HoMieSk8eR156:..i know what i had .. i lost it and now ill do every thing i can not to let that happen again
jsmn m y lo v e: mee too babe. i want us to be together as long as possible. (uhh foreverrr)"
at least you thought so before. whatever.
anyway. hung out with tiffany at the mall for a bit. too bad dress doesn't look that good on me. BELT please? i think so.
gaaah i can't wait to get it. (:
then went to safeway seen urriel. talked to her for a bit.
then i think i seen audrina walking home today...? but im not sure if it was her cas i couldn't see. X|
i m t o y w y l m
3.09.2009
FML to the max
Hella bad fuckin day and it's only monday.
FUCK.
went to my optometry appt. with the madre. then the dumbass bitch doctor chick tells me i can't wear contacts because im not responsible. THE FUCK BITCH!? how the fuck would i know if my eyes were irritated when they always kinda been like that? the fuck? what am i suppose to wear my glasses? i dont think so that shit gives me a bad ass headache. but now i'm contactless for a week. & my moms over here tryna say it's cas i wear makeup. ARE YOU FUCKING STUPID!? why the fuck would it be makeup? hella people with contacts wears makeup. why would there be a difference with me? the fuck. and then she's over here tryna yell at me through my earphones. CANT HEAR YOU BITCH IT'S TOO LOUD FOR YOUR DUMBASS VOICE. fuck man. WTF. im fucking pissed. and then i have a test on wednesday & today we had a review & why the fuck... i dont know most of that shit. wtf. math is hella easy too. & then i have a midterm due at the end of the fucking week.
& then some people are being gay.
how are you gonna say 'IDK' when i ask you when we're gonna hang out?
& then how is it that when you thought i was with tiffany you got hella excited but you dont even wanna hang out with me.
well fine then FUCK IT.
i wanna smoke. & drink. fuck what they say i'll do what i want.
i wanna club.
FUCK MY LIFE.
FUCK GLASSES.
FUCK BOYS.
FUCK YOU.
make me feel better
i'm gonna watch danny.
FUCK.
went to my optometry appt. with the madre. then the dumbass bitch doctor chick tells me i can't wear contacts because im not responsible. THE FUCK BITCH!? how the fuck would i know if my eyes were irritated when they always kinda been like that? the fuck? what am i suppose to wear my glasses? i dont think so that shit gives me a bad ass headache. but now i'm contactless for a week. & my moms over here tryna say it's cas i wear makeup. ARE YOU FUCKING STUPID!? why the fuck would it be makeup? hella people with contacts wears makeup. why would there be a difference with me? the fuck. and then she's over here tryna yell at me through my earphones. CANT HEAR YOU BITCH IT'S TOO LOUD FOR YOUR DUMBASS VOICE. fuck man. WTF. im fucking pissed. and then i have a test on wednesday & today we had a review & why the fuck... i dont know most of that shit. wtf. math is hella easy too. & then i have a midterm due at the end of the fucking week.
& then some people are being gay.
how are you gonna say 'IDK' when i ask you when we're gonna hang out?
& then how is it that when you thought i was with tiffany you got hella excited but you dont even wanna hang out with me.
well fine then FUCK IT.
i wanna smoke. & drink. fuck what they say i'll do what i want.
i wanna club.
FUCK MY LIFE.
FUCK GLASSES.
FUCK BOYS.
FUCK YOU.
make me feel better
i'm gonna watch danny.
3.07.2009
random ass flashbacks
It's hard to imagine yourself 50 years from now, if you're married to the person you really wanna be with right at this moment. It's easier to look back on the past things you've experienced. Great or gruesome, the choices you made those past days that took you down the path you look were a part of life. Looking back upon how i ended up being here today is just funny and weird!
to believe that i wanted to marry that person who introduced me to the one person i wanna be with most now. I hella thought he was the one; but, i guess he was the reason why i met kevin in the first place... I'm not saying i regret being with him. It's just weird when you think about what you wore say... 3-4 years ago. You see a picture of you in a black stretchy v-neck whom your cousin had the same shirt, the reason why i have no idea. I think my dad bought it for us. A green sweat suit jacket with the hood up, long unfixed hair, NO MAKE UP whatsoever, old navy 'skinny' jeans that looked more boot cut then skinny, a black belt that you put sideways and some vans...
or that time when him & all his friends came to your house because they wanted to fight people and what you wore was hella ugly! the only thing i remember was a pink skirt with capri jeans under that had the ends folded but looked like pants because you're hella short for em!
or that time when i thought me and kevin were going on a date so i hella dressed up and curled my hair to look pretty for him, we ended up hanging out with tiffany, aeriel and melanie and other people i forgot who... and he said to me, "why'd you curl your hair today?" and i said "cas i wanted to" or something like that... i was HELLA moded.
or that time when we first first started dating in the summer and we were at green valley, and everyone was skating and we sat on a curb next to your van and we started kissing and you hella opened your mouth and i pulled away hella nervous and it went like this:
"what're you doing!?"
"... nothing..."
"are you trying to french kiss me!?"
"...no"
"Lol yes you are!"
hah, i loved the faces you used to make at me like that time you were laying on matts bed and you wanted me to kiss you and you were like "baaaaaaaabee!!"
or when we were standing hella close to eachother and i wanted a kiss id pucker up and get on my tiptoes and close my eyes and you'd bend down a little and kiss me...
but then there were those other times... id rather not mention...
good times, good times...
BUT ANYWHO before i was hella side tracked.
It's really weird... thinking about the past and how you thought you would end up hella did the opposite of what you wanted and nothing really ended up the way you wanted it to, even though you want something so badly to happen you almost tasted it but blew it because you mentioned a topic that he didn't want to get into...
but it's not like you met hella good ass people along the way right? even though things didn't end up the way you want, along the way of trying to get over him, hide your feelings you meet people you actually never thought about before.
but there are also times when i just dont wanna really meet anyone else because you already get me... you already know me... you've got everything down crossed the T's and you've dotted my I's... but i guess that is boring...
i just want you to be happy.
I'm not over you, but in time you'll just be a big part of my life that i'll never forget and i'll always love you kevin.
i miss those days where we'd take a nap in your room
or when we'd watch movies and i'd fall asleep and you woke me up by kissing me on the nose and lips and calling me babe... and that time when i was sick and we went to your mums and we fell asleep on the floor and we had to drop me off at my house and i you hugged me out of nowhere...
good times very good times...
i admit, i miss you but this time you aren't the center of my world. & the next one that comes along won't be either...
but i hope the next one is you.
it's so unclear, where do we go from here
oh love
the passion we shared is unparallel
ive had others in my time but none can compare
to our chemistry to the energy we share
and all all i want is you
it took some time but i see now that you are the one
and all i want is you
see we've been living in a blur
questioning if this is lust or love
giving ourselves up to one another with no strings attached
attached
oh love
it hit me with a ton of bricks
i woke up and realized this was it
the very love i was searching for
don't need to look nomore
all i want is you
say you hear me
please let me know
that you feel me
i dont wanna go on without you
trust me, i'll do anything to make you happy
and trust this love is all you'll ever need
to believe that i wanted to marry that person who introduced me to the one person i wanna be with most now. I hella thought he was the one; but, i guess he was the reason why i met kevin in the first place... I'm not saying i regret being with him. It's just weird when you think about what you wore say... 3-4 years ago. You see a picture of you in a black stretchy v-neck whom your cousin had the same shirt, the reason why i have no idea. I think my dad bought it for us. A green sweat suit jacket with the hood up, long unfixed hair, NO MAKE UP whatsoever, old navy 'skinny' jeans that looked more boot cut then skinny, a black belt that you put sideways and some vans...
or that time when him & all his friends came to your house because they wanted to fight people and what you wore was hella ugly! the only thing i remember was a pink skirt with capri jeans under that had the ends folded but looked like pants because you're hella short for em!
or that time when i thought me and kevin were going on a date so i hella dressed up and curled my hair to look pretty for him, we ended up hanging out with tiffany, aeriel and melanie and other people i forgot who... and he said to me, "why'd you curl your hair today?" and i said "cas i wanted to" or something like that... i was HELLA moded.
or that time when we first first started dating in the summer and we were at green valley, and everyone was skating and we sat on a curb next to your van and we started kissing and you hella opened your mouth and i pulled away hella nervous and it went like this:
"what're you doing!?"
"... nothing..."
"are you trying to french kiss me!?"
"...no"
"Lol yes you are!"
hah, i loved the faces you used to make at me like that time you were laying on matts bed and you wanted me to kiss you and you were like "baaaaaaaabee!!"
or when we were standing hella close to eachother and i wanted a kiss id pucker up and get on my tiptoes and close my eyes and you'd bend down a little and kiss me...
but then there were those other times... id rather not mention...
good times, good times...
BUT ANYWHO before i was hella side tracked.
It's really weird... thinking about the past and how you thought you would end up hella did the opposite of what you wanted and nothing really ended up the way you wanted it to, even though you want something so badly to happen you almost tasted it but blew it because you mentioned a topic that he didn't want to get into...
but it's not like you met hella good ass people along the way right? even though things didn't end up the way you want, along the way of trying to get over him, hide your feelings you meet people you actually never thought about before.
but there are also times when i just dont wanna really meet anyone else because you already get me... you already know me... you've got everything down crossed the T's and you've dotted my I's... but i guess that is boring...
i just want you to be happy.
I'm not over you, but in time you'll just be a big part of my life that i'll never forget and i'll always love you kevin.
i miss those days where we'd take a nap in your room
or when we'd watch movies and i'd fall asleep and you woke me up by kissing me on the nose and lips and calling me babe... and that time when i was sick and we went to your mums and we fell asleep on the floor and we had to drop me off at my house and i you hugged me out of nowhere...
good times very good times...
i admit, i miss you but this time you aren't the center of my world. & the next one that comes along won't be either...
but i hope the next one is you.
it's so unclear, where do we go from here
oh love
the passion we shared is unparallel
ive had others in my time but none can compare
to our chemistry to the energy we share
and all all i want is you
it took some time but i see now that you are the one
and all i want is you
see we've been living in a blur
questioning if this is lust or love
giving ourselves up to one another with no strings attached
attached
oh love
it hit me with a ton of bricks
i woke up and realized this was it
the very love i was searching for
don't need to look nomore
all i want is you
say you hear me
please let me know
that you feel me
i dont wanna go on without you
trust me, i'll do anything to make you happy
and trust this love is all you'll ever need
3.02.2009
via; you
So while i'm in my phase of changing majors. I'm trying to stick to one... and stick it out for a bit to get ahold of what i really wanna do.
FUCCKKKK nursing. i love babies. but, all the work and years to become a nurse is just not as crackin as i thought it would be.
but while im sitting just starting to do nothing, i look at my page and see all the sappy shit i have on it.
so, this.... is to you my dearest loveliest peoples:
(it's just scattered thoughts but i think you'll get the drift if i'm talkin about you, but if not... that's is just too bad)
- i still love you, but you're not making this easy for me, every time i think about you... it just gets me a little sad... there's no telling what will happen between us. in the end; it's always going to be you that will come into my mind when i come to judgement on something in m life.
- if i think about it, i don't really want to move on. BUT that doesn't mean i won't do it...
- i'll talk to other people, give them chances, they probably wont work out until i find the one that just seems to fit with me...
- i'm not gonna hang out with people i don't wanna affiliate with.
-the reason why your back stabbing bestfriend betrayed you in a way you could somehow NEVER believe would HAPPEN to someone LIKE YOU is because, my dear dear cousin is because that's the same situation you put me through.. just i got even in more then one ways.
- you're a dumbass for going back. really... somehow i knew you were weak.
- idk why you still try and be buddy buddy, even with his mom. you're nothing but baby... you take what's not yours and try to make it your own, but when you find out that someone else has your old toy.. you want it back again.
- why don't you just leave already and forget about him. he already has...
- he never even loved you, trust me i know.
- i'll always consider you one a valuable friend
- nothing lasts forever, so keep it while its good.
- i wanna be friends with you, just after your done with your phase
- i love you
- NO ONE will EVER make you feel the way i did, not matter what you think... i'll always be the that person...
- i think when we see each other again after a long leave of absence... we'll both feel at least something upon eye contact.
- i hope things gets better between us
- i want his number.
- i wish at least once you'd think of me and text me bitch
- asdfjkl; my mom....
FUCCKKKK nursing. i love babies. but, all the work and years to become a nurse is just not as crackin as i thought it would be.
but while im sitting just starting to do nothing, i look at my page and see all the sappy shit i have on it.
so, this.... is to you my dearest loveliest peoples:
(it's just scattered thoughts but i think you'll get the drift if i'm talkin about you, but if not... that's is just too bad)
- i still love you, but you're not making this easy for me, every time i think about you... it just gets me a little sad... there's no telling what will happen between us. in the end; it's always going to be you that will come into my mind when i come to judgement on something in m life.
- if i think about it, i don't really want to move on. BUT that doesn't mean i won't do it...
- i'll talk to other people, give them chances, they probably wont work out until i find the one that just seems to fit with me...
- i'm not gonna hang out with people i don't wanna affiliate with.
-the reason why your back stabbing bestfriend betrayed you in a way you could somehow NEVER believe would HAPPEN to someone LIKE YOU is because, my dear dear cousin is because that's the same situation you put me through.. just i got even in more then one ways.
- you're a dumbass for going back. really... somehow i knew you were weak.
- idk why you still try and be buddy buddy, even with his mom. you're nothing but baby... you take what's not yours and try to make it your own, but when you find out that someone else has your old toy.. you want it back again.
- why don't you just leave already and forget about him. he already has...
- he never even loved you, trust me i know.
- i'll always consider you one a valuable friend
- nothing lasts forever, so keep it while its good.
- i wanna be friends with you, just after your done with your phase
- i love you
- NO ONE will EVER make you feel the way i did, not matter what you think... i'll always be the that person...
- i think when we see each other again after a long leave of absence... we'll both feel at least something upon eye contact.
- i hope things gets better between us
- i want his number.
- i wish at least once you'd think of me and text me bitch
- asdfjkl; my mom....
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